Best Ass Quotes

You know, it really doesn`t matter what the media write as long as you`ve got a young and beautiful piece of ass.

At the end of the day it doesn’t matter what anybody else thinks as long as you’re happy.

It’s gonna be okay, no matter how hard your rock bottom is, you can rise above it and you can come back.

God has blessed you richly, so get down on your knees and thank him. Don’t forget the less fortunate or God will personally kick your ass. I’d love to do it for him, but I can’t be everywhere.

Some age. Others mature.

If you make an ass out of yourself, there will always be someone to ride you.

Ninety-nine percent of the failures come from people who have the habit of making excuses.

You better get busy living, because dying’s a pain in the ass.

He who learns, and makes no use of his learning, is a beast of burden with a load of books. Does the ass comprehend whether he carries on his back a library or a bundle of faggots?

Where’s the church, who took the steeple, Religion’s in the hands of some crazy ass people, Television preachers with bad hair and dimples, The God’s honest truth is, it’s not that simple

Architecture is the triumph of human imagination over materials, methods, and men, to put man into possession of his own Earth. It is at least the geometric pattern of things, of life, of the human and social world. It is at best that magic framework of reality that we sometimes touch upon when we use the word order.

Shine it up real nice, turn it sideways, and stick it straight up your candy ass!

If I’m an ass, I should say so. If I don’t, somebody else will. If I say it first, that disarms them.

A traveller should have a hog’s nose, a deer’s legs, and an ass’s back.

If you can look at a crime where everything points to one answer and not see it, you’re a dumb-ass. And if you can look at the deficit and not see that the problem is that the rich stopped paying taxes, you’re a Republican.

Prince Charming is very nice and very honest and very confident in who he is and funny and knows how to have a kick-ass fun time. Is willing to melt away so that nothing else exists in the world except himself and his princess and loves food and cats and every life form except human beings which is not necessary.

Vision creates faith and faith creates willpower. With faith there is no anxiety and no doubt – just absolute confidence in yourself.

I am an old scholar, better-looking now than when I was young. That’s what sitting on your ass does to your face.

If you’re not in the arena also getting your ass kicked, I’m not interested in your feedback.

I can’t be paralyzed anymore by the critics. My new mantra is, if you’re not in the arena getting your ass kicked on occasion, then I’m not interested in your feedback. You don’t get to sit in the cheat seat and criticize my appearance or my work with mean-spiritedness if you’re also not in the arena.

It’s a practice for me every day, sometimes every hour of every day. It is an absolute practice. When I went into the research, I really thought that there are authentic people and inauthentic people, period. What I found is, there people who practice authenticity and people who don’t. The people who practice authenticity work their ass off at it.

Have the courage to face a difficulty lest it kick you harder than you bargain for.

The Sun does not realise how wonderful it is until after a room is made.

My experiences with the older audience and, selectively, the people I hang out with or run into, they all want to see Arnold [Schwarzenegger] kick some ass.

I know I’m getting old because there will be times when I’m not even doing anything and I’ll think, ‘I need to go wipe my ass right now.’

Form ever follows function.

They call me Seymour Butts, cause I get more ass than most.

Life is like a cucumber. One minute it’s in your hand, the next it’s up you ass.

Sebastian, en Español, is a bad ass name.

I’m the one usually wearing the dress, which is what I would’ve preferred, but they wouldn’t let me. It’s been 15 years since I did that and my ass isn’t as good as it used to be.

Jeff Foxworthy is a legend. Every time I see his moustache it reminds me to wax my lip and every time I hear his jokes it reminds me to wipe my ass.

I’d like to say I’m ready to kick ass and show the guys how it’s done. But I’m not here to prove anything about being a woman. I’m here to drive a race car and try to win a race.

Fiction either moves mountains or it’s boring; it moves mountains or it sits on its ass.

FEMA I always thought was a bone here in your ass.

Jim Fregosi was not only one of the most respected men in baseball, he was a great man. He was a player’s manager. He had that special gift as a manager that made you want to get to the field and play your ass off for him. Jim Fregosi was the reason that 1993 was one of the most exciting years in Philadelphia sports history.