Please find below a curated list of 2,078 of The Best Jokes Quotes by notable women and men. Please consider sharing with others any of the Jokes Quotes that resonate.
Americans like to talk about (or be told about) Democracy but, when put to the test, usually find it to be an ‘inconvenience.’ We have opted instead for an authoritarian system disguised as a Democracy. We pay through the nose for an enormous joke-of-a-government, let it push us around, and then wonder how all those assholes got in there.
I planted some jokes in my wedding. Like, the organizers asked me to select music. So when I approached wife at the ceremony, they played the second movement from Shostakovich’s 10th Symphony, which is usually known as the portrait of Stalin. And then when we embraced, the music that they played was Schubert’s Death and the Maiden. I enjoyed this in a childish way! But marriage was all a nightmare and so on and so on.
I always put these pert jackanapeses out of countenance by looking extremely grave when they expect that I should laugh at their pleasantries; and by saying Well, and so?–as if they had not done, and that the sting were still to come. This disconcerts them, as they have no resources in themselves, and have but one set of jokes to live upon.