Browsing Topic Best Funny Beer Quotes

You can’t be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline. It helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer.

The fact that a believer is happier than a skeptic is no more to the point than the fact that a drunken man is happier than a sober one.

When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. Sooooo, let’s all get drunk and go to heaven!

I have a total irreverence for anything connected with society except that which makes the roads safer, the beer stronger, the food cheaper and the old men and old women warmer in the winter and happier in the summer.

He that drinks fast, pays slow.Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.There can’t be good living where there is not good drinking.

Milk is for babies. When you grow up you have to drink beer.

I fear the man who drinks water and so remembers this morning what the rest of us said last night

Wine is constant proof that God loves us and likes to see us happy.

Beer is a wholesome liquor…..it abounds with nourishment

There cannot be good living where there is not good drinking.

Buy a man a beer, and he wastes an hour. Teach a man to brew, and he wastes a lifetime.

You can’t drink all day if you don’t start in the morning.

An oppressive government is more to be feared than a tiger.

I once shook hands with Pat Boone, and my whole right side sobered up!

If you drink don’t drive. Don’t even putt.

There is no strong beer, just weak men

Beer. Now there’s a temporary solution!

You’re not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

If you resolve to give up smoking, drinking and loving, you don’t actually live longer; it just seems longer.

I would not have thought of eating a meal without drinking a beer.

Many battles have been fought and won by soldiers nourished on beer.

An alcoholic is someone you don’t like who drinks as much as you do.

Who cares how time advances? I am drinking ale today.

Let a man walk ten miles steadily on a hot summer’s day along a dusty English road, and he will soon discover why beer was invented.

Alcohol is the anesthesia by which we endure the operation of life.

Drinking beer doesn’t make you fat, it makes you lean…Against bars, tables, chairs, and poles.

Alcohol may be man’s worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.

An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools.

Some people wanted champagne and caviar when they should have had beer and hot dogs.

When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.

Oh, you hate your job? Why didn’t you say so? There’s a support group for that. It’s called everybody, and they meet at the bar.

When I drink, I think; and when I think, I drink.

Now son, you don’t want to drink beer. That’s for Daddies, and kids with fake IDs.

I drink to make other people interesting.

Beer makes you feel the way you ought to feel without beer.